Moving right along. A few things...
Higher being,
I know you're connected to possibility and possibility makes me think of love THEREFORE I know you're connected to love. If there is ever a chance that life begins again I ask that you pave my way directly to my soulmate. Please :) That way we can just start life together this time. *smiles* Greatly appreciated.
-Ash
I remember it like it was yesterday. Heartbroken on the job. Moping around wondering what I must've done wrong to deserve such neglect. Wondering why guys always hold onto the good girls but seek fulfillment elsewhere. I was talking to Phil (a not so wise man) BUT he once told me a wise thing...
"Ash I understand you're upset. You have every right to be. Some men or boys for that matter are dumb. They know they have good women. The reason we hang onto you is because if one day we decide to mature we want to know that we still have you. It's like asking you without asking you to "wait until I'm ready" & it sucks but that's what it is"
Chimes chimed in unison in my head and I couldn't believe a guy was giving me the inside scoop. I felt like Darla when Alfalfa let her in the "he-man woman haters club" & even though we don't talk or work together anymore I'm glad that we talked that day. He never judged me all those times I came to work with that "fuck the world" look on my face. The only thing he'd say is "You need to stop entertaining these little ass boys" I rolled my eyes before but NOW I see he was right and had my best interest. Thank you Philly :)
I'm ALWAYS baffled by ANYBODY cheating. It's like why not be single? Made me realize how truly selfish people are. They will sit there and watch you give up everything and let you do it. I've been there too many times and it didn't seem dumb as hell until I got out of it. Though I don't mind giving. It's in my nature but I might as well be my own damn man lol I can love myself better! I didn't choose to be with you so we can constantly play hot potato lol duhhhhhhhhh!
You jerks don't discourage me though!
I know that when I'm ready and up to par you'll be waiting. & I'll never feel lonely again. I'll be able to appreciate every amazing part of you. It's what you deserve. & you'll insist on doing the same for me because you love me. Right? lol jk I know. I know :)
Love is pretty. Love is like when you wake up from a good night's rest because you feel the warm sun shining on your skin :) I like to love...love.
I found a little love the other day...
Right on MY carpet a little rainbow. I was so happy and flattered at the same time lol I'm so weird but I love it.
& at the park I found a few more little loves...
My donkeyfriend. He likes to be called Don Q. Hey idk that's what he said.
Bestfriends. I liveeee. Precious.
My koi friends. & a nice little kiddo. Sweet.
OH & here's my bday pic lol
I was feeling pretty warm at this point lol Tropical Berry Mojito. Thee bomb :D New fave drink.
LMFAO! Bffs. My sister is gangsturrrr.
My mom :) Yes she is that bright. Clap on clap off lol
& my new fave from yesterday...
The hair is BANGIN! I look so happy lol
Enough pictures. Yeah? Mmkay! :D
*major yawnage*
So I'm pretty much grateful for the union that is Chrash :) Thanks to Chrash I now go to bed on time (kind of) & I laugh everyday. 2 of the most kickass people alive. Smart, poetic and goofy. ALL DAY lol The best kept secret. Chrash has arrived! Errrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr BOOM! LOL! Love you :)
I'm sleepy but I'm gonna fight it. I'm all alone tonight.
Night stars :)
-Ash
P.S. This is like my fave hook of the week...
I'll be the rising moon after the setting sun
Just to let you know you'll always have someone
I'll be the clearest day when the rain is done
So you'll always know
If you like it. It's my gift to you.
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